Viewing all items in Resource Category: St James The Least of All
The elderly Anglo-Catholic vicar, Eustace, continues his correspondence to Darren, his nephew, a low-church curate recently ordained…
- The Rectory St James the Least My dear Nephew Darren Your decision to place a notice board outside your church seems a good one – and its design in blue plastic with luminous red detachable letters seems entirely in keeping with the aesthetics of your building. Make sure that it is lockable, however, as an...On how to run your notice board
- The Rectory St James the Least of All My dear Nephew Darren This year, the rigours of Lent have taken second place to a far more pressing matter: the installation of a lavatory at St James the Least of All. Personally, I entirely disapprove of this additional sign of decadence in our moral...On the nonsense of having a lavatory at church
- The Rectory St James the Least My dear Nephew Darren While it was good to see you when you visited us last Sunday, your suggestion to our churchwardens that chairs would be far more comfortable than our pews was not well received. You must remember that significant in any congregation firmly believe that the more...On why pews are better than chairs
- The Rectory St. James the Least My dear Nephew Darren Your idea for our two churches to hold a combined New Year’s Day walk was an admirable one, although I could sense a certain clash of cultures when your party arrived at the starting point with boots, waterproofs and GPS equipment. Our own group, rather...On how to mix town and country – or not
- The Rectory St James the Least of All My dear Nephew Darren I am sorry I was not alive during that wonderful four-year period when Oliver Cromwell abolished Christmas. Just think! No Christmas parties, no carol services, no cards to send and no frantic last-minute shopping. That man was a hero. Planning for Christmas at...On the best ways for a vicar to disrupt Christmas
- The Rectory St James the Least of All My dear Nephew Darren One of the rather dubious pleasures of being rector here is to dine twice a year with Lord and Lady Shuttlingsloe. I was summoned to go along yesterday evening. As usual, I was greeted by the footman and led into the entrance hall,...On the perils of eating with members of your church
- The Rectory St James the Least of All My dear Nephew Darren Our Lord said that we will always have some poor with us; were He to have been speaking to the clergy that day, I suspect He may well have said that we will always have some awkward parishioners with us. My cross at...On what to do when some of the PCC ‘goes green’
- The Rectory St James the Least of All My dear Nephew Darren Your withering comments, saying that our choir robes, were ‘surplice’ to requirements did not go down well at last week’s practice. I will concede that Mr Baddeley’s robes smell somewhat kippered and are laced with burns – but you can expect little less...On the peculiar stains and smells of old choir robes
- The Rectory St. James the Least of All My dear Nephew Darren Since your church is a former cinema, I suspect that were the floor to be removed, cigarette ash, sweet wrappings and tickets for the last Charlie Chaplin film would be revealed. Our marble flooring in the chancel was raised last week to try...On the discovery of a long-lost crypt
- The Rectory St. James the Least My dear Nephew Darren The estimate for re-hanging the bells in our church tower came as a great shock. The church council discussed fund-raising at length. Someone suggested selling part of the Rectory garden for building, another for getting 200 parishioners to loan £1,000 each, interest-free. Then Mrs Ffrench...On the delights of the parish jumble sale
- The Rectory St James the Least My dear Nephew Darren Never, ever feel aggrieved that your summer strawberry tea has to be held in the church hall rather than on a lawn, since there is hardly a single blade of grass to be found in your entire parish. You have no idea of the...Beware the summer strawberry tea
- The Rectory St James the Least My dear Nephew Darren So, your bishop is dropping hints that you should begin to consider a move to having your own parish – ‘not forever in green pastures’ comes to mind. Do not be too hasty to leave; remember that a curate can do no wrong, but a...On the tribulations that await a curate in his first parish…